Four Star

When it comes to reviewing music and film, there are those who argue that a perfect, ten-out-of-ten rating can never be achieved because one day someone could make something even better. I have some sympathy with this theory, but only if the reviewer employs a suitably fine scale - a maximum of 9.9 or 99%, for example, should be adequate to describe even the most life-affirming album or film, with the final, impossible increment reserved for the day when Jesus turns up with a twelve-string and reveals the third testament to be a melancholic alt-folk odyssey.
Most reviews, though, don't divide their ratings this finely - they use stars. Perhaps it's because they're conscientious understanders of science, with a knowledge of the huge and unpredictable errors associated with subjective reviews, or perhaps it's because those pretty stars are easy for people to understand. Either way, my point is this: the Radio Times uses stars, so giving the top rating of five-out-of-five shouldn't be too much of a stretch, and yet Monty Python's Life Of Brian was recently given four stars. I mean, this is the best film ever made by the funniest people in the history of Great Britain (yes, I know one of them was American but let's keep this simple), and apparently it's not worth five stars! I can't even be bothered to explain why this film is so good - if you've seen it, you'll know that giving it four stars is an insult. Giving it it four stars ranks Life Of Brian alongside half-decent action films, surprisingly good rom-com sequels and slightly flawed epics, and that just ain't right.